Thursday, April 22

Waiting for Rain

Bee and Ants on Sneezeweed

 The winds rattle the roof tiles and shake the dust from the shaggy bark junipers. Dust and pollen coat the deck chairs and screens driving the no-see-ums inside.  Thunderstorms are predicted this evening. The new plants need the rain and its connection to cloud and air. I need to settle the dust and get some relief from itchy eyes and constant sneezing. Weather. Love it!

Tuesday, March 16

Little Cloud


"We sit together, the mountain and me, until only the mountain remains."- Li Po

There is a special place I visit. I discovered it when I was just a child, maybe seven or eight years old and in all of the years that I have visited this place, it never changes.

It is a flat, jutting, red-rock shelf above a pasture where a glossy, black bull roamed. He was the lonely king of the long grass and cottonwoods, always smelling the creek water nearby and sometimes busting down the fence to drink and wallow in it when necessary.  Below the sandstone overlook, junipers and cypress host sparrows and finches competing for insects while watching for the shadows of hawks and eagles. The language of birds, their compulsion to sing is amazing to watch and hear, born of caution most likely.  Up through the trees, past quail and sometimes mule deer, the first slabs of rock appear. Lizards dance in the sun and black stink bugs meander. I've spent time watching this unselfconscious display until my own shadow falls on them and they become wary. 

Up on this mountain top, I feel clean wind, space and the weight of my own thoughts. Often, after a few minutes of silence, life compresses into long moments of mindlessness. That's when my eyes close and I feel the sun melt the last chunk of anxiety from my being and I sit with the mountain.

Saturday, March 6


Abandoned Blue Chair

Abandoned Desert Motel

Abandoned People

“Dreaming is not only an act of communication; it is also an aesthetic activity, a game of the imagination, a game that is a value in itself. Our dreams prove that to imagine - to dream about things that have not happened - is among mankind’s deepest needs. Herein lies the danger. If dreams were beautiful, they would quickly be forgotten.”
― Milan Kundera, The Unbearable Lightness of Being

For a little less than a year, now, I've had dreams with a recurring theme: abandonment.  I call them pandemic dreams and most of them feature urban landscapes with office workers or groups of purposeful, busy people. I never can recall how the dreams begin and when I wake, these dreams are like a box of abandoned puzzle pieces, mementos of impossible and frustrating landscapes. 

I am driving on a downtown city street and pull into an underground parking garage of a high rise building. For some reason, I must hurry to an office area and either bypass the reception area or there isn't one. I can't find a person who is in charge or who will know why I'm there, so I wander from floor to floor ignored by everyone. I realize that I'm just an office drone, invisible, ubiquitous so I find an empty desk and search for something that I can use to appear busy. I wind up in the copy room which is always occupied and I collect discarded documents to take back to my desk. No one notices that I am an intruder and when a sharp-eyed worker walks by, I shake my papers and act like I'm delivering them somewhere.  I feel tense and apprehensive and unimportant.

Finally, the day ends. It's dark outside and when I leave with all the others, we go out a way that is not how I entered the building. I wind up outside, disoriented, and I realize that I either forgot my purse in my car or in the building so I don't have any identification or cell phone or money and I don't know anyone. 

At this point in my dreams, I either connect with some of the workers and wind up in a public place or house, frantic. Or, I walk in ever widening circles, avoiding danger, exhausted and fearful until I wake up. 

These dreams vary and I seldom remember them in logical sequence. The common theme is disturbing and after a few of these, I realize how much compassion I have unwittingly gained for displaced people or people suffering from dementia/alzheimers. To feel stranded, abandoned, and even worse, insignificant in real life because of a disfunctional family, a life threatening event, a disease, etc., must warp a person and cause terrible pain. We never know the story behind our masks of normality. Our world is inhabited by all kinds of complicated beings who deserve some kindness and care.

Thursday, January 14

Give Me a Moment

Thirsty Bluebirds

Shut it
- Kathy Mackey

What are you smiling about?

Nothing, just happy. 

How’d that happen? 

Don’t know; it just did. 

Been watching tv lately? 


Been on facebook lately? 


Check out twitter today? 


Hear the latest on trump? 

Shut it. 

Still smiling? 


May all beings know moments of happiness, often.

Saturday, January 9

A Tsunami of Thugs


Living With MAGA Delusions

“In America the Struggle was befogged by the fact that the worst Fascists were they who disowned the word "Fascism" and preached enslavement to Capitalism under the style of Constitutional and Traditional Native American Liberty. For they were thieves not only of wages but of honor.”
― Sinclair Lewis, It Can't Happen Here

I am so grateful for those legislators who protected my vote.  Thank you Secretary of State Hobbs, US Senators, Sinema and Kelly; LD1 Congressman, O'Halleran; the justices who dismissed baseless claims of fraud; AZ electors who certified the vote for Biden; and Governor Ducey who did not join Arizona legislators who supported President Trump in his refusal to concede to Biden and who later incited a failed coup to retain his power.

America owes a special debt of gratitude to US House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, and Congressional leaders who showed tenacity, wisdom and courage in reconvening Congress on January 6, 2021, to finalize the counting of Electoral College ballots. Not only did this action confirm that Joe Biden was elected President.  It re-established the rule of law and integrity of Congress. 

I have great respect and gratitude for all of the legislators who told the truth and upheld Biden's win throughout Wednesday night's vote count. You all did your lawful work under terrible circumstances. You did not support the lies that Arizona voters are cheaters and therefore cannot be depended on to vote honorably. Or,  that hundreds of poll workers and poll watchers conspired to destroy, modify, substitute, and lose hundreds of thousands of ballots virtually overnight and in cahoots with only those "swing states" that ultimately voted for Biden.  Thank you for recognizing the honesty and integity of the voters of Arizona and of the nation, including those voters who cast ballots for President Trump. You protected our democratic right to vote our conscience and affirmed the will of the majority of citizens to have Joe Biden and Kamala Harris lead us out of this morass of bitter failure, further destroyed by vicious  trumpbillies and militia thugs

"What stands in the way, becomes the way."- Marcus Aurelius
We will build back better!

Saturday, January 2

Make Politics Boring Again

Happy New Year! May all beings know peace and prosperity and the calm assurance that balance is restored.  Enough of the rallies. Enough of red vs. blue. Enough of the drama. Let's make politics boring again.  Put the focus of our lives back where it counts. Let's get to work.