Sometimes a person you love gets lost and wanders alone in a dark place.
The terror of that loneliness chills your heart and you struggle to banish the coldness. You examine your experiences, your strengths and weaknesses, and try to find something outside yourself that might guide this loved one out of the darkness. Then you realize that you do not know the dark terrain this person must travel and you are terrified. The only thing you know is that this person is good despite the self-destructive path she has chosen. You remember how loving, thoughtful, giving and joyful she was before she got lost. You know that this is her true nature and are baffled and disturbed that she is fearful, dishonest, violent and self destructive.
You want to wrap her up in a blanket of your love and carry her through the darkness and away from the path she chose. You want to save her and save your own sanity at the same time. It is not your nature, not your style to stand back and watch someone you love suffer. You need to take charge. This is your struggle. You interfere, you intervene, you try to understand the incomprehensible, and you exhaust yourself and others in your struggle until you realize that you are lost and wandering too.
It is at this dark hour, that you dig deeper inside yourself and discover the truth. By now, you don’t love yourself as much as you used to. You feel like a failure. You feel like you are somehow at fault for the darkness that obscures every waking moment, and you need the light and warmth of self love to get you through this struggle. You look in the mirror and see the dim, but constant glow of self love reflected back. You close your eyes and study the glow until you realize that you must love yourself, unconditionally. You love life. You love your life. You love that lost part of yourself and you want the present part of yourself to be a guiding light to the joyful heart you know is the real you. You want this unconditional love for yourself and you want to share this love with the person who got lost in the first place.
The lost may or may not see our heart light. If we love them, we will keep this beacon strong and bright for them and for us. It is the only thing that pierces the darkness and guides them to their true selves. When they lose their self love, we love them unconditionally and give them a vision of their true self: honest, healthy, strong, and loving. We support the truth of this person and reject the falseness of their fearful behavior. We support the truth of their struggle to make a way in the darkness, and reject their manipulations, selfishness and defiance when the struggle is hard.
We hold the light for them by being truthful. Truth tells us that we cannot fix this person or the environment in which they wander. We cannot protect them from themselves. We can affirm their true nature, a perfect, loving creation of spirit. We can guide them by our example and be an honest, loving, compassionate person. We can love their spirit, unconditionally, and offer them an oasis in the desert of their self loathing. We can celebrate their victory over the darkness, knowing they will win.
Sometimes a person you love gets lost and wanders alone in a dark place. They must struggle to find their way and we must struggle to be a light along the way.
May all beings know love and peace.
