"Doldrums", pl. noun: A period of stagnation or slump. A period of depression or unhappy listlessness. Avoir le cafard, broyer du noir. De capa caÃda.
History
by Carol Ann Duffy
She woke up old at last, alone,
bones in a bed, not a tooth
in her head, half dead, shuffled
and limped downstairs
in the rag of her nightdress,
smelling of pee.
Slurped tea, stared
at her hand--twigs, stained gloves--
wheezed and coughed, pulled on
the coat that hung from a hook
on the door, lay on the sofa,
dozed, snored.
She was History.
She'd seen them ease him down
from the Cross, his mother gasping
for breath, as though his death
was a difficult birth, the soldiers spitting,
spears in the earth;
been there
when the fisherman swore he was back
from the dead; seen the basilicas rise
in Jerusalem, Constantinople, Sicily; watched
for a hundred years as the air of Rome
turned into stone;
witnessed the wars,
the bloody crusades, knew them by date
and by name, Bannockburn, Passchendaele,
Babi Yar, Vietnam. She'd heard the last words
of the martyrs burnt at the stake, the murderers
hung by the neck,
seen up-close
how the saint whistled and spat in the flames,
how the dictator strutting and stuttering film
blew out his brains, how the children waved
their little hands from the trains. She woke again,
cold, in the dark,
in the empty house.
Bricks through the window now, thieves
in the night. When they rang on her bell
there was nobody there; fresh graffiti sprayed
on her door, shit wrapped in a newspaper posted
onto the floor.
History beat me down this morning. It's depressing to realize how ignorant I am.
Last night, The Daily Show featured Jason Jones' visit to Arizona State University which hosted President Obama today. Jones went to ASU asking why the university was not giving Obama an honorary degree and the responses were too stupid to imagine. In one part of the interview, Jones' asked three frat rats if any president deserved an honorary degree from ASU and when the name Hamilton came up, all three agreed he deserved one. I recognize that Franklin and Hamilton were not presidents. I also recognize that ASU is in the heart of red neck, conservative McCain country, and a true desert wasteland for progressive, liberal politics. (I should know, I spent most of my childhood and teenhood in the Phoenix pressure cooker.)
And... for a moment I felt superior to the lunkheads featured in the Jones' satire until I tried to name all forty-four presidents (erm... 44, right?).
I must have had US history nightmares because I woke up this morning with an unhealthy obsession about the presidents. As soon as I heaved my bulk out of my Select Sleeper bed, I had to know their names. I read their biographies. I got curious about the many wars started and ended by our leaders. I was surprised to realize that when Andrew Jackson deregulated the banking industry, his successor, Martin Van Buren got to clean up the mess of the "panic of 1837." So much of what is happening today is a repetition of the mistakes made in the past.
My recent historical obsession started when I rented the HBO miniseries, "John Adams" which is a magnificent recreation of the terrifying years of American history from 1770 to 1826. It shows the harsh colonial life and "deglorifies" America's gritty roots. The most interesting aspect of this mini series is its coverage of the turmoil in France, England and Spain. The world was quaking and ripping apart at the seams. The "old world order" of kings and vassals was ending and America was a weak and fractured part of this chaos. America's growing pains were/are acute.
I saw another great historical series on PBS last week., "We Shall Remain." I am conflicted about the greatness of America. This country was created for white, Europeans and was successful in integrating these cultures into one nation. People of color were not included and were either exterminated or exploited. Grim stuff. I cringe when I hear patriots beat their chests about America being the greatest country in the world. It is a great country filled with wonderful people, but we are not delusional, folks. Bad shyte happened to a lot of good, disenfranchised people. The PBS series exposes the unfairness and cruelty of the American political philosophy of manifest destiny which considered the Indian tribes of the Americas and the black, labor force as less than human. The only way to look back and learn something is by suspending judgment and by sifting through facts. Fortunately, the history of native Americans is being rewritten and their truth is told in this sad, fascinating and painful television series.
The most fascinating segment was about the Shawnee leader, Tecumseh. I remembered reading a historical novel called "Panther in the Sky" years ago about the turbulent life and times of this great Indian war chief who tried to unite the tribes against their common enemy - American expansionism.
Despite our ignorance, history embraces us. It shakes us.
It holds up a mirror and asks the question, "Where are you going?"
And I have to say, the doldrums are pretty crowded these days. I'm here. Old lady, history, is here. The ASU frat rats are here. The ousted neo cons own the place. It's time to break out.
Beautiful sunsets are just one reason to love Hawaii. According to a recent Gallup-Healthways survey...."Utah, Hawaii, and Wyoming top the nation in well-being in an analysis of more than 350,000 interviews conducted in 2008. Southern states West Virginia, Kentucky, and Mississippi have the lowest well-being ratings."
